Have you ever noticed that when two otherwise lovely people cannot get along, it is often due to similar gifting? Rather than recognize and honor gifting as from God, parties with similar talents can clash due to a need to control and dominate which negatively affects God’s desire for shalom for themselves, the church and world.

I imagine this was the situation the Apostle Paul wrote of in his letter to the church at Philippi, calling out two prominent leaders and pleading for an end to their bickering and strife for the good of all.

In Philippians 4, Paul begins by lovingly addressing the church members in broad and unusually affectionate terms, going so far as to tell them that they are his pride; his “crown.” The word “crown” in the Greek meant “reward,” and referred to the leafy crown placed upon the head of the Olympic winner. In this way, Paul tells the Philippian church that they are his “reward,” as this first church built on European soil was also a model for other churches that came after.

Abruptly, however, in verse 2, Paul singles out two church leaders and earnestly implores them to get along; to be of one mind. Truly, here we witness a truth of all communal life— “a house divided against itself cannot stand.” Although we are not told the circumstances of the leaders’ disagreement, Paul relays to readers the internal state of mind that creates actions toward our neighbor which is pleasing to God and leads to shalom in one’s heart and on earth.

Paul calls on believers to walk in spiritual agreement by modeling Jesus’ example of caring for the wellbeing of our neighbor as we would our own body. In other words, if the leaders’ disagreement was over the things of this world, then Paul is reminding them (and us) to follow Jesus’ example and mandate to “love one’s enemies.” In fact, the only one characteristic that will make us children of God in heaven is dependent upon loving our enemies, defined here as people with whom we are not in agreement (Matt 5: 43-48). To the extent that leaders attempt to promote societal equity, justice, and liberty, their success and the wellbeing of others will hinge on the degree to which they acknowledge and live into their role by recognizing their leadership as a spiritual gift and leading from that gifting rather than from ego (Rom 12:6-8).

I Corinthians 13: 4-5 tells us that love is key. Not the sentimentalized love that passes as mushy feelings. Don’t get me wrong; our hearts should be soft for the suffering of others just as Jesus had compassion for all the human suffering he encountered. The problem comes when feelings are all we have. Jesus’ love risked all for others, and the truthfulness of his love was expressed through action, costly action. We know love because Jesus “laid down his life for us.” Similarly, it is not possible for us to “love our neighbor as ourself” if we remain apathetic to our neighbor’s need. Love seeks out the well-being of others in a concrete way, and the truth of love is in that action.

Then, as now, our engagement with one another even as we may disagree must be reimagined in light of God’s faithfulness as an eternal force of love and mercy that seeks conversion even of seasoned leaders. Love of neighbor, agape love, is imperative to the journey on the narrow path of participation in the delivering presence of God in our world.

— Reflections appears regularly on the religion page. The column features a variety of local writers, coordinated through the Monroe Area Clergy Group. Christie Mandas is the associate pastor of St. John’s United Church of Christ in Monroe.