Let’s say your child signs up for an extracurricular activity. How do you know if their participation in this activity is a success or not? It seems to depend on the goals they have set. If they just want to meet new people by joining a choir, they’ll be able to tell if they reached their goal. If their only desire is to be a world champion rock climber, the measure of their success might be quite a few years away. Our expectations often become the measure of our success or lack thereof.
When you’re evaluating a coach at a youth level, two people might approach this evaluation from very different perspectives. Is the goal excellence and victory? Or is the goal for the children to have fun, be active and gain a few life skills (like following the rules, making a plan, adapting to real-life circumstances when the plan isn’t working, etc.)? Either of these sets of goals could be argued for as the “best approach.” One’s evaluation of the coach would vary greatly based on what the measure is.
What is the goal of the spiritual life? Jesus said: “You, therefore, must be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect” (Mt 5:48 E SV). Well, it seems that Jesus has set the goal for us to be more like “striving for excellence” than “having fun and making friends.” Yet our intuition tells us that this “perfection” Jesus is asking of us is impossible (or maybe that’s just our experience talking?). So what do we do? Throw this idea out? Reinterpret it according to the empty modern individualism which says “be perfectly you”? Or do we take Jesus at His word and look deeper for how it might hold true?
The same Jesus who said “Apart from me you can do nothing” (Jn 15:5) also said “With God, all things are possible” (Mt 19:26). Does that mean that even my sanctification and perfection are possible? Apparently. How do I do that? The key must be something along the lines of recognizing that Jesus is the Perfect One, and if we unite ourselves completely to Him, then we can share in His perfection.
How do I do that? Well, that’s a life-long kind of pursuit. It’s like asking a child what it will take to become a world champion. They don’t know all the elements, but they do know it will require a lot of hard work and effort, the exercise of a lot of willpower, the need for a lot of help. In the process, children look to emulate the example of “the best” and need coaches to help them strive for excellence. Why do they quit? Well, why did you and I quit our pursuits to be the best at something? Because we began to believe it was impossible (or something else became more important to us).
How do I strive for holiness? There are two things we can’t do. One, lower our expectations and begin to think our life with God in the Church is primarily about some form of comfort or community or entertainment. Two, we can’t despair and begin to believe that holiness is impossible.
One of my spiritual heroes, St. Teresa of Calcutta, perhaps said it best by her words and her way of living: “Holiness is not a luxury of the few, it is a simple duty for each one of us.” May our measure always be perfection. May our goal always be to be like God — to be holy.
— Reflections appears regularly on the religion page. The column features a variety of local writers, coordinated through the Monroe Area Clergy Group. Fr. Dave Carrano is the new Parochial Administrator of St. Clare of Assisi Parish (Monroe and Brodhead), St. Francis Parish (Belleville and Albany), and St. Joseph Church (Argyle), working as part of a team of three priests who began their ministry here on July 1, 2023.
