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Meanwhile In Oz: Junk in Earth's orbital front porch
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While we all spend a good deal of our time on Earth picking up junk, you should see the junk various space programs have left orbiting our planet.

For anyone with a moment of free time and a computer, log onto http://stuffin.space. This will show you some of the functioning and nonfunctioning objects man has put into space around the earth. There's a lot of junk up there.

How many things orbit the earth with no purpose? According to the National Aeronautics and Space Administration (NASA), the number is about 500,000. This includes no-longer-functioning satellites, booster rockets and even tools left behind by spacewalking astronauts.

We've left so much junk orbiting the earth that our ability to put more advanced satellites into orbit is jeopardized. Any piece of this space junk could collide with $1 billion or more of newly-designed equipment, and that would be a disaster.

Some people find space junk fascinating. Those who don't have enough space to horde on in their Earthly lives dream of leaving string-tied bundles of magazines in the nooks and crannies of space.

One man's space junk is another man's space treasure. That was the premise of a 1979 television series starring Andy Griffith called "Salvage 1" about a scrapyard dealer who invented his own space shuttle and ventured into the great beyond to pick up all the junk we left on the moon and in zero gravity.

Picture Griffith wearing a cheap '70s motorcycle helmet and blasting to the stars.

You probably don't remember the television series because that was junk of another kind.

The world's No. 1 source for detecting objects in near-Earth space is the United States Strategic Command, which is our early warning system for missile launches. Its technology allowed it to track nearly 18,000 artificial objects in orbit in 2016. Of those objects, only 1,400 were operational satellites. That means 92 percent of the largest detectable objects orbiting the earth are junk.

Who wants to clean up space? The Chinese.

According to an article in the scientific journal Optik, which has been shared roundly - I read about it in Popular Science - a member of the faculty at China's Air Force Engineering University has proposed building a laser-armed space "broom" to target larger pieces of space junk. The laser would shoot the junk 20 times, burning away pieces of the debris, but more importantly altering its orbit and sending the junk into Earth's atmosphere, where it would burn into oblivion.

Scientists are skeptical about China's plan. While it seems a space-based laser "broom" would "make space green again," such a piece of technology could serve as a weapon. China's laser could target military satellites of other nations.

Although this orbiting junk is just spinning around the earth, this junk actually belongs to countries and corporations. These countries and corporations have lawyers. And should a giant space broom sweep away an old satellite that cost hundreds of millions of dollars to build, there theoretically could be a lawsuit filed for damages.

Sweeping the heavens of unwanted space junk isn't easy technologically or theoretically.

While we continue to contemplate this, there are about 90 attempts each year to send more satellites into space. Those that fail, or satellites that reach orbit and don't function, just add to the layer of junk surrounding our planet.

Anyone waiting for friendly aliens to land has to remember they have to navigate the belts of astrophysical broken washing machines, old refrigerators, beer cans and broken bottles in our celestial front yard.

Aliens seeing the junk rotting on our orbital front porch may simply drive by, deeming us too messy for a visit.



- Matt Johnson is publisher of the Monroe Times. His column is published Wednesdays.